"The noble hunter in repose, after a day of presiding over the open savannah."

According to everyone in my office, today's news is SPORTS! This year, I am tipping my top hat to Count Summersmythe auf dem Plortsweser's new team-sporting venture, which has received a pallet of hundred-dollar bills from the fine meatrasinos at Quigley's to get them up and going.

I was playing LEGO with one of R. Monkeys' nieces the other day. That's good, because she subscribes to the same school of thought that I did and do, whereby you are obligated to dump the LEGO out on the floor so that your rug looks like a giant pile of studded plastic vomit. Then you can create. The bonus is that, because I have kept my LEGO in a sort of plastic oil drum for the last twenty years, dumping them out reveals all the random things that a younger me shoved in the bucket rather than put away. This time I found some Meccano, a bit of tin foil, and one of the soft plastic "horns" from my giant Z-Bots plastic playset thing. Here's what that looked like. I'd forgotten.

There's a store here that imports a bunch of toys, candy, video games, and similar whatnot from overseas. One of the categories of whatnot they import is condoms. That may be a potentially iffy area as far as the FDA is concerned, but moreover they sell them under the name "Safety Latex". They also had a blindfold/sleep mask labeled as "Sun Blocker". This spurred some discussion about potential lines for expansion of their "Prudish Personal Products" line.

Perhaps they'll expand their product line. But I don't know what they're so worried about. Everyone knows the dirtiest stores are West Marine and McMaster-Carr.

This has been a very trying time for my productivity. On Saturday I went from no TV to a TV, and no GTA V to some GTA V, and then that same afternoon copies of Pokémon X and Y came for R. Monkeys and myself. It's even worse than last year, when I happened to finish building the Mac Pro/W3680/GeForce 670 right when the Steam Summer Sale started.

My manservant, Milosz, has been tasked with impersonating me for the next couple of weeks at all sporting events, international grands prix, employment-related mandatory attendance sessions, and monster recognition trainings. Covering for me at all factory openings, rhythm and blues revues, police academy graduation ceremonies, and wrestling events will be Marky "Fortran" Al-Tawehi, former body double of Angela Merkel and current Duke of Pepsi Presents Unified Silesia. Lastly, all ship christenings, declarations of martial law, and International Criminal Court hearings will be attended by a talking labrador who I have trained to stand on its hind feet. I appreciate your patience and understanding during this time.

Dammit Draper, we trusted you with the accounts, or whatever.

Really pleased; this guy looks new. It's not quite new old stock -- it was a floor model before being stored.

My Machine for Queen was a great success. It made it through the whole "Live at Wembley Stadium", until the foam around the left Advent's woofer dissolved right at the end of "God Save the Queen". I commend the speaker for sacrificing its own integrity to sell the bit. (The left Advent still had its original foam; I re-foamed the right one about five years ago after it dissolved due to vibrations in a U-Haul. It's only about $20 for everything you need to do the job.)